De-Clutter Your Love Life

by The Group Hug February 2, 2022, 6:41 pm 1.8k Views

What if the messiest part of your life isn’t about badly folded clothes and a lack of storage boxes, but about decluttering the area that brings so many of us, so much grief?

We are of course talking about dating. Imagine this: you’re standing in front of a sock drawer, but instead of footwear in various colours and patterns, you’ve got categories of all kinds of partners, neatly organised in a row (How great would that be? One for every mood).

Depending on your personal experience, there’ll be platonic relationships and good friends, followed by occasional hook-ups, a whole load of dating apps (and conversations that are stuck in an endless loop of ‘how’s your day been’), exes and f*** buddies (the same category for some), crushes, casual-with-potential dates and current partners. Getting your dating life in order isn’t as easy as folding socks, so here are some top tips on how to do detox dating!

You should also detox your behaviours and the activities that don’t bring joy, love and happiness.

So often we get used to what is familiar and accept not just a lack of joy, but much worse than this, we often accept behaviour and relationships that destroy and rob us for the rest of our lives, because of how it makes us feel about ourselves – this is down to a lack of CONFIDENCE in ourselves.

What joyless behaviours do you currently have?

Alcohol – do you wake up every morning wishing you hadn’t drank that bottle of wine?
Exercise – maybe you spend too much of the weekend watching tv and every Monday morning wishing you had got your lazy backside into gear and done some exercise?
Work – do you hate your job but the weeks pass and you still haven’t even attempted to look for something new?
Healthy Eating – do you step onto the scales and wish you had a healthier eating style?
Relationships – are you in any relationships romantic or friendships, which just get you down?
Money – do you get to the end of the month and wonder why you have nothing to show for the money you have spent. You wish you had budgeted and knew where your money was going.

Only you can turn things around and do something about the above. It’s all about positive thinking and doing.

Top tips on how to declutter your relationship!

Firstly let resentments go. Bringing up past misdemeanours only clutters your relationship with toxicity.
Declutter your bedroom & wardrobe. Create a sensual sanctuary by getting rid of anything that is not needed or makes you happy. Replace old candles, update massage oils and treat yourself to new bedlinen. Clear out old clothes that you dislike, remind you of bad times and that remind you of a different body-shape! Don’t let this special room make you feel the gloom.
Ask for what you want from your partner. If you are not getting your needs met, what is it you want them to change? When you get clear on what it is you want, you make it easy for them to understand.
Stop nagging. Don’t clutter your relationship up with white noise – repeating the same thing over and again – you won’t be heard and will become increasingly frustrated. Change the way you communicate and the needs that aren’t being heard.
Clean up your expectations. If you are feeling disappointment with your partner more often than you should, it is because your expectations are not being met. When you expect your partner to behave different to the way they always have, you are setting yourself up to feel let-down and your partner to feel resentful. If you’re single, I feel your pain. Navigating the fragile dating landscape can be difficult, stressful and disappointing. You can’t change how others behave, but you can improve your own methods.

Maybe you’re overloading on dating apps, flicking through four or five different ones at the same time, but not really investing your time in any conversations. Or, perhaps you’re committing your time to people who aren’t emotionally available and don’t treat you the way you deserve?