When you are going through a tough time, it is really important that you can practice self-love; it will really help you to feel confident and give you the inner strength to make it through. When you learn to love yourself, you will have boundaries and live a more fulfilling life as you will no longer need to rely on others. This is really important if you have always chosen partners because you felt that you needed someone to fill a void in your life. Being in relationships because of this reason can sometimes see you ending up with the same type of wrong person over and over again. Loving yourself before you look for a partner can lead you towards more meaningful future relationships.
Kick your life back into shape
So what is self-love? How can you learn to love yourself?
Firstly, the concept of learning to even like yourself, let alone love yourself may be completely alien as your negative beliefs have been embedded within your very being for such a long time. You are going to have to make a conscious decision to change your opinion of yourself.
Think about this: If you don’t love yourself, how can you expect someone else to love you? Hmmmm.. interesting.
We all have choices and you can choose to continue with the negative self-talk or make the decision to love yourself from now on. You will need to accept your inadequacies. No one is perfect, even though they may look like they are on instagram!
Look in the mirror
See the good in yourself and accept any flaws because they are the foundations of the amazing person you are.
If you have slipped-up in the past, don’t beat yourself up forever. Acknowledge the mistakes and forgive yourself. We all make errors of judgement and we are afterall, only human.
I want a divorce but I’m really scared
Laugh and have fun
Make sure you enjoy life to the max. If you can see the funny side of life and and not take things too seriously, you will naturally relax and find yourself worrying less. When you can laugh at and with yourself too, that’s even better! Don’t take yourself too seriously either! Remember it’s all about self-love.
Mute that negative voice
Self-criticism is suffocating. All that negativity pouring from your own head, telling you not only what you cannot do, but what you will not achieve, STOP. Concentrate on the positive things you CAN do and for the things you can’t achieve, well, turn those into positives by understanding that you can ask for help. No one is good at everything and we all have different skills and strengths.
Always be true to yourself.
Always acknowledge what you are going through and never bury your feelings. Whatever you are going through, consciously accept that you are feeling sad or worried and think positively about how you can deal with the situation. If you are happy, make sure you appreciate this and celebrate it.
If you are putting in the effort, that’s what really counts. Effort is the resilience you are exhibiting to get yourself through a difficult situation, trying to change, doing something new.
Be positive and kind to yourself
When you start to be nice to yourself, your whole persona will change. You will have more frequent positive thoughts and good things will start to happen. Positive people naturally develop because their mental bandwidth isn’t filled with negativity. They shine and that in turn attracts nice positive people. We only have so much headspace and we can either fill that with darkness or sunshine. If you just can’t shake-off the negativity, speak to your GP, a counsellor will be able to work with you on this.
The positive things you should do after your divorce
Stop worrying and let self-love in
If you are a worrier or suffer from anxiety, this might not be easy. If you need some extra help with dealing with anxiety or stress or any of the other steps mentioned, reach out to a coach our counsellor to find out where your anxiety stems from. Something may have happened, even way back in your childhood which is giving you that feeling of “flight”; where you just want to run from issues.
Don’t be afraid to tackle this head-on with a professional. Anxiety and worry is crippling for many people. You are not alone in this. Stay positive and explore what you can do, rather than what you cannot. Be brave and true to yourself, admit that you are suffering and reach out. You will feel a whole lot better for it and it will be another step towards true self-love
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Learn to relax
When you take time-out away from work, you are showing yourself that you value your health and body. Take a bath, light candles, listen to music, read a book or close your eyes and enjoy the silence. This is self-love.
Connect with nature
Look around you and see the natural beauty all around. Step outside in the evening and gaze at the wonder of the stars and galaxy or go on a country walk. Make sure you stop and listen to the birds singing; take notice of the tiny creatures all around. Be conscious.
Give your self-confidence a boost
If you are good at something and want to take it to the next level, do it! There is nothing better than improving on something you know you enjoy and where you know you can succeed. It could be anything from running faster to baking better, we all have a skill and we just need to tune in to what it is that makes us special
Enjoy your journey of self-discovery and remember that we have coaches and therapists in The Hug Directory who can help you along the way to find self-love. Reach out today. If you need any further information you can contact the team at The Group Hug right HERE